Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Street Scenes

This afternoon I saw two things on the street that struck me as odd, even by Midtown Manhattan standards.

Outside Macy's, a woman dropped the cigarette she was smoking onto the sidewalk, picked it up, and put it back in her mouth. I guess if you're already a smoker it doesn't really matter what other nasty shit you put in your body, but EW. I tend not to be squeamish about living in New York. I know that when I touch a stairway railing, or hold a subway pole, or, frankly, walk into my gym's locker room, I'm taking my life in my hands. I can't live in a bubble, and germs are, as Dan Savage would say, the price of admission. But dude, you don't pick up things off the streets of New York and put them in your mouth! No! Bad tourist!

A few hours later I saw a man wearing a belt that said "JESUS IS MY BOSS." I suppose it's a fine sentiment if you like that sort of thing, but it seemed a strange thing to emblazon above one's ass. I couldn't help thinking that "Jesus holds my pants up" would have been more appropriate. Then again, the belt was upside down, so maybe Jesus needs to hire some smarter employees.